How am I ever going to keep climbing / backpacking / skiing / camping / biking after I have kids? I can’t push myself as hard as I used to or go as far as I used to now that I’m pregnant! It will never be fun again! My friends / coworkers were right, I’ll never do anything outdoors again! Life is over!

Obviously most of that is not true, exploring the outdoors with kids is amazing. It is just a lot different - sometimes much harder and sometimes way better. Here are some tips on adjusting to being an outdoor parent:

Preparation while pregnant or waiting for adoption:

• For pregnant moms: lower expectations - work on just being happy to do things even if you can’t do them to the level you used to.
  • This is much easier said than done, but remember you’ll get stronger again after the baby comes
• Prioritize spending time with any outdoor parent friends you have and start watching how they do things with kids
  • If you don't have any outdoor parent friends, look into joining a group like Hike it Baby
• Get any gear needed for outdoors for the first year 
  • Specifically: baby backpack carrier, baby bike seat/trailer, snowsuit
  • Look for deals on used items - we have found a lot of good deals if you are patient
• Make plans for an outdoor adventure to do after the baby comes and put it on the calendar - this forces you to get out there, even when you’re sleep deprived

How to adjust to doing things with babies:

• In general, lower expectations (just like for pregnant moms)
• Prioritize spending time with any outdoor parent friends you have, or look into joining a group like Hike it Baby
• Hiking:
  • Hiking is a good transition activity because it's fairly easy to do with babies, just be ready to stop often to feed/change diapers
  • If you’re nursing, bring extra water because you’ll be thirsty, and be prepared to stop often or practice nursing the baby in the carrier
• Camping: 
  • Put the kid in the car seat or in a travel crib at the campsite while you set up camp or cook dinner
  • Many babies love hammocks
  • Bring a table seat for feeding
  • Something warm for the baby to sleep in, such as a fleece sleep sack (instead of a sleeping bag for small babies)
    • Sleeping bags only worked with our kids at about 3 years because our kids moved too much and came out of them, but might work for others sooner
    • Other options: have the baby sleep in the parent's sleeping bag, or bring a crib size quilt
  • Some babies sleep better in a travel crib in the tent
• Climbing:
  • Outdoors:
    • Bring at least one extra person so someone can take care of the baby
    • Try bouldering (even if you didn't do it as much before) because you can sometimes do without a third adult and don't need much set up time
  • Indoors: 
    • Put your baby in an infant car seat while you climb at the gym
    • Time belays to when the baby is happy or sleeping
• Biking:
  • Trailer or baby seat - but you generally need to wait until they're about 6 months old for a helmet and to use the bike carriers
  • Carry them in baby backpack or front carrier if you feel comfortable 
• Skiing: 
  • Cross-country:
    • Take baby with you in a baby backpack 
  • Downhill:
    • Parents can take turns, use radios to tell the mom when nursing is needed
    • Have the baby sleep in the car seat or in a wagon in the lodge

How to adjust if you waited until the kids are bigger before getting back out:

• Keep doing it - they will eventually start whine less
• If you like several activities and the kids like one activity better, encourage the one the kid likes and maybe do the others less for a while
• Remember everything changes with kids every few years - if they don't like your favorite activity now they might like it later
• Tailor the activity to the kid - look for places to stop on your hike/bike ride that the kids like or bring things for them to do while they’re waiting
• Bribe them with snacks - you can taper the snacks off over time as they enjoy the activity more
• Bring other kids for them to play with
• Take lots of breaks
• Develop routines and have gear always packed so you can get out the door faster

How to find time to do things without the kids:

• Put them in classes while you do the sport
  • Great plan for skiing, but usually after they're 3 years old
  • Some resorts offer infant daycare but it's expensive
• Date nights:
  • Get a babysitter and spend a night at the gym or going out for a ride
• Date lunches:
  • Workout together while kids are in daycare
  • While on maternity/paternity leave, meet the working parent for lunch and have one parent workout while the other gets quality time with baby
• Take turns:
  • Go solo or go with friends
  • Go on a trip with another adult and have the parents take turns

But whatever you do, don't listen to the naysayers who think that the outdoor life is over once you have kids. It may take time to adjust, but that is just part of becoming parents. Keep getting out there and it will keep getting easier.​

In a perfect world for most outdoor families our kids walk or bike (or ski) to school each day. We don’t want to strap them into cars for the short journey to school, or we want to bike commute ourselves. This is great when the weather is perfect and the sun is out, but then there’s the rest of the year. And many of us (ourselves included) are part of a two working parent family, so the kids are in after school programs or all-day daycare/preschool and have to be picked up when it's dark out.

​What are the best ways to get the kids to school and home as safely as possible, while minimizing whining?

Make it a habit: 

• If they know it will happen (almost) every day, and you won’t change your mind, there will be less whining. 

Make it fun: 

• Put fun lights on their bikes.
• Make sure they have warm clothes
• Make sure they have rain pants/jacket if it’s raining
• Put a bell on their handlebars
• Put toys in the trailer

Set up an organization system for the gear:

• Getting to school:
  • Have the parent bring any critical items with them so that they don’t get left behind in classrooms
    • Helmets, warm layers they don't need for playing, reflective vest
• Coming home:
  • Create a routine for charging the lights to make sure you the batteries run out
  • Set up a storage system for the gear at home so everything is easy to get to
  • Get kids in the routine of putting everything away as soon as they come home

Here are some tips on gear to use:

Clothing:

• Warm layers:
  • Helmet liner or balaclava
  • Snowpants to pull on over school pants
• Hands:
  • Full-finger bike glove or ski liner glove
  • Ski mitten (if very cold and if the kid can operate the brakes safely)
    • I used an OR shell mitten over warm gloves when biking in the winter in Wisconsin, because it blocked the wind and had more dexterity than an insulated mitten, but it doesn't seem like anyone makes something like that for kids
• Wet weather gear:
  • Rainpants to pull on over school clothes
  • Rain jacket
  • Rainboots

Bikes:

• For babies/toddlers - bike trailer or WeeHoo
• For bigger kids - WeeHoo or tagalong (our favorite is the Burley Piccolo for it's stability)
• Leave the trailer or tagalong at school if the parents split drop-off/pick-ups, as long as you have access to them from the after school program
• Cargo bike if both parents can share it or if only one person is doing both pick-up/drop-off (they're expensive and pretty specialized, so not often worth buying two of them)

Gear hauling:

• Trailers are great for carrying gear and keeping them dry (button down the rain cover for the kid of course)
• Waterproof panniers on the adult’s bike to carry backpacks
  • This is important when the backpacks don't fit under reflective vests (or if the backpacks aren't reflective) and also to keep them dry in the rain

Other references for good tips on bicycle commuting in the winter:

• Cycle Sprog tips on biking in the winter
• Rascal Rides tips on bicycle commuting with kids

Bike touring can be a really fun way to explore new places with kids, including small kids. Our biggest concern was to find a place with bike paths or roads that we felt were safe enough to take kids on for longer distances. Ideally we wanted a place where we could go camping as well. ​

Since we were visiting family in Europe, we decided to try bike camping in France, which is famous for bike camping on the canals. We spent 10 days bike camping in Brittany, with a 3 year old and a 6 year old and all four of us had an amazing trip. I don’t know of places to do this in the US, so I would love suggestions if there are good places to do it closer to home. ​​

​Here are our tips on how to go bike camping with kids:

First, figure out the kids transportation method:

• For small kids or babies, trailers work well
  • We used a Burley trailer, but there are other manufacturers
  • As a bonus, trailers also can fit a bunch of gear in them
• For bigger kids, use a tagalong
  • We used a Burley tagalong - I find it much more stable than the tagalongs that attach to the seat post, such as a Novara one
  • Consider putting a gear rack on the tagalong - the one we rented had that and we put the bulky mattresses there
  • Some of our friends really like the Weehoo, which also fits smaller kids than the regular tagalongs and also has gear storage

This is the tagalong we used that had a rack on it.

The biggest challenge to hiking or backpacking with kids is keeping them moving. It's so important, because we all need to be able to count on completing our hikes before dark or making it to our campsites in time for dinner. Here are the tips we have compiled over the years of hiking with our kids and with our friends:

Get the right pacing and timing of breaks:

• Take enough breaks: 
  • Try to time breaks to milestones based on distance or time
  • Plan for longer breaks to play/play cards every certain time/distance
• But don’t take too many breaks - experiment to find the sweet spot, keeping in mind it changes over time
• Communicate the timing of the breaks so kids can track their progress to the next break
  • Make sure to give the kids their own watch or map if you do this

Be prepared with multiple options of entertainment (rotate through these as needed):

• Try Geocaching 
• Bring pocket guides for animal or bird or plant identification
  • Count how many of a common thing you can find or keep track of who can find the most varieties
• Print out a scavenger hunt to have the kids fill out while hiking 
  • But remember they have to fill it out while still moving!
• Play “I Spy”
• Play the "Alphabet Game" - you have to find something that starts with each letter of the alphabet, in alphabetical order
• Make up stories to tell, or tell stories from books you’re reading
• Hike with their friends - so they entertain each other
  • Even better, if you hike with another family try splitting up the kids and their parents (because our kids often hike farther with other grownups)
• Pick up a Junior Ranger activity book at the park visitor center and try to complete the activities during the hike
• Teach them how to use a topographic map and compass and have them practice

How to avoid stopping in between designated breaks:

• Put water bladders in the kids’ packs so they don’t have to stop to drink water
• Give them some snacks to put in their pocket to eat while hiking
• Help them take layers on/off while walking
  • Make sure they keep the right layers on so they don't get too cold or hot
• Pack the right clothes and check on them during the hike
  • Make sure they don't wear clothes that will give them chafing or blisters
  • Prevent sunburns by putting sunscreen on (obviously this is important in general, but it does make it even harder to hike)
• Bribe with food: 
  • Give them “hiking treats” that have to be eaten while moving 
  • Remind them of a snack and break they are going to get after a certain time or distance
• Give them something to look forward to after the hike (ice cream in town or at the camp store, or a swimming destination)
• Find a hiking stick to play with while hiking (although sometimes this backfires and slows them down)
• If you feel you have to let them stop, try not to let the kid sit down, tell them they can only take a standing break
• And of course, develop standard responses to all the excuses they will come up with for stopping (because you know they will repeat them over and over). For example:
  • Tie their shoelaces yourself so they don’t come undone
  • Remind them to pee during a break
  • Have them take off or put on a layer after a break

Our biggest advice is to keep experimenting and keep getting out there! We believe that you will eventually find something that will work for your family. If you have any specific questions, feel free to reach out to us. And as always, please give us more suggestions of things to add to this list.

​Backpacking with small children can try your patience, but keep getting out there because each year gets easier! We started with our kids when they were able to hike a mile or two. This meant that for us we had a “gap year” in our family backpacking journey, between when we couldn’t carry them any more and when they could walk on their own. Here are our tips to make it work:

What can your kid carry: (Note: these are rough suggestions, adapt them to your kid’s size and ability levels and consider starting with less stuff when they’re older if they’re less experienced)

• 3-4 years old: snacks, small toy, maybe water (keep it very light at this age to encourage them to carry the pack)
• 5 yo: add in more water, headlamp, mug, spoon, maybe playing cards
• 6 yo: add in toiletries, something for group gear (we had our son carry the trowel and TP)
• 7 yo: add in some clothes
• 8-9 yo: add in sleeping bag/sleeping pad

2 yo enjoying her Big Agnes Little Red

Key items for the parents to carry:

• First aid kid, and make sure to include any child-specific versions of medicines you might need and fun bandaids
  • Consider getting Wilderness First Aid or Wilderness First Responder trained
• Extra water (in case kids spill it, or if they aren't carrying it)
• Lightweight sleeping bag, pad, stove etc - since you're still carrying other people's stuff it's really worth it to invest in a few key lightweight items
• Tent
  • Stay small as long as you can - we only switched to two two person tents when our two kids were bigger (we used a three person tent for the four of us before that)
• Platypus gravity filter - the water can be filtering while you're doing other things (or you can train the kids to do it)
• Extra snacks or special treats - for tough spots on the trail

How to pick a good backpacking route for kids:

• Distance: 
  • Many kids can “hike their age” starting at 3 or 4 up until 9 at least (one mile per year of age). It’s a fun challenge to give to them!
  • When backpacking, pick something shorter than what they usually do while on day hikes until you’re sure they can do it. 
  • Some kids are motivated to hike all the four thousand footers in New Hampshire at only 5, some (like my son) can hike 11,000' mountain passes at 5 but take a lot of pushing, and some (like my daughter) are less excited about hiking but love the destination. You need to understand your kids, know when to push them and know when not to. 
• Other hike features to look for:
  • Water (always the #1 choice for my kids)
    
  • Interesting wildlife (banana slugs to count!) or flowers to identify
  • Rocks to scramble over (the domes in Tuolumne Meadows are a good example)

Other tips:

• Make the kids help out with chores (getting water, setting up tents) and adjust the expectations as they get bigger
• Try not to carry the kid's backpack - once you give in it’s hard to give it back. Instead, you need to keep the pack light enough that they’ll carry it the whole time but ensure they are carrying something and that every year they carry a bit more.

The final thing is to find lots of creative ways to motivate your kid to keep moving down the trail. I have a lot of ideas on this one, so I'll save them for a future post.

​Taking your baby on a backpacking trip is a great introduction to outdoor parenting. We took our daughter on her first backpacking trip when she was about 9 months old. It was only one night and just a two mile hike but we loved being able to give her the experience of being in the backcountry with us from an early age. Here are some of our tips on how to make it happen:

We fit the bigger skis on the roof and the little kid skis in the trailer hitch box. Other items we put in the box are food, helmets, poles, backcountry gear (skins, probe, beacon), and ski backpacks. 

For storage inside the car, the big thing we did to make it easier was remove the console between the front two seats. We covered the hole that was left with a custom piece of carpet that we bought online in a color to match the car. We added two D-anchors in case we wanted to anchor anything between the seats and these are bolted down to the anchors that held the console in place.

Inside the car we keep clothes bags, any personal items (books, flashlights, etc), and ski boots, to keep them a bit warmer at night. During driving mode, these items are right behind the driver and passenger seats and anchored down with an elastic cargo net that clips onto the attachment points for the cargo seats (that is left behind after we took the cargo seats out of the car).

When we switch to sleeping mode, this stuff can be put between the two front seats, on the seats, or in front of the seats. Usually we put the car seats on the front seats first, then put the items in the spaces around them, before setting up the cot.

With this plan, the amount of time spent moving stuff around for set up and take down of the beds is minimized, and we've been able to fit in everything we need for a full week-long trip in the van.

Just like most of you, we love to go on short weekend camping trips between busy work weeks, especially when we can get out with other families. But nothing ruins a short weekend of camping more than starting it off leaving late Friday night because packing takes too long. Then you can end up getting stressed out, yelling at your kids, and fighting with your spouse. Which never happens to us....

What follows are our recommendations for avoiding that.

Our high level recommendations:

• Pack as much as possible ahead of time
• Keep the packing list simple - don’t bring all the toys (for kids or grown-ups)
• Dedicate certain items to camping so they're always ready to go

Our packing list:

1. ​Sleeping stuff (sleeping bags, pads, headlamps)
2. Tent
3. Camp kitchen (stove, fuel, box of kitchen stuff) and camp chairs
4. Small daypack for each person with a few personal items (book, water bottle, small toys or hiking entertainment, first aid kit, etc)
5. Clothes & toiletries
6. Food
7. Last minute items (pillows, books, wallet, cellphone)

The packing is divided into 3 sections:

• Pack ahead of time - always ready to go (Items 1, 2, 3): These should be stored in easy to reach places
• Pack ahead of time - assembly required (items 4 & 5): Hand out packing lists to each family member, one person to ensure it gets done and packed
• Last minute (items 6 & 7): Pack right before leaving​

Other recommendations:

• Use packing cubes - one color per family member, use two sided ones with one side labelled dirty and one clean
• Use one duffel bag for all packing cubes
• Keep the hiking backpacks stored ready to go with water bladders and any hiking toys for the kids
• Keep the camping kitchen in a storage box close to the kitchen so it's quick to clean everything and restock it, ensuring it's always ready to go
• Create laminated packing lists and cross off items that aren't needed for that particular trip before handing it out to everyone to pack
• Use packing lists with drawings for the kids who can't read yet

Using these tips, we can usually pack for a weekend trip in less than 1 hr ahead of time plus 30 min the day of and then unpack in less than 1 hr.

One final note: when you're packing for a short trip, don't spend too much time ensuring you have every single item on your packing list (except of course for any especially critical or life-saving items). The extra time required to go from 95% correct to 100% correct can be 1-2 hours which isn't often worth it for a short trip. If you do forget something, use it as a teaching opportunity for the kids to learn how to live without having everything. We have a long list of items we have forgotten on trips and it makes for good stories. (Like when our daughter had only climbing shoes instead of regular shoes for an entire weekend, or when we forgot the fuel last weekend.)

​Our biggest concern about sleeping in a van during ski season was staying warm, specifically keeping the kids warm. 

We considered propane heaters, both portable ones (like a Mr Buddy heater) and permanently installing one in the wall of the van. We also found one that runs on the car’s gasoline. However we were very concerned about carbon monoxide poisoning, especially if the car gets covered in snow. 

We looked at electric blankets hooked up to a big battery, but it seemed that it might not last all night and we’d be constantly recharging the battery. And we couldn’t recharge it in one day from a small solar panel on the roof. 

In the end we just decided to see how warm we could stay without extra heat during the night. We figured we could ease into the ski season by starting when it was still warmer weather and if we found the weather getting too cold we could drive 45 min down the mountain to where it’s warmer and sleep there overnight. 

Our plan was to have everyone sleep in sleeping bags. We heated up the car as much as possible before bed (after inspecting the exhaust pipe to confirm it wasn’t blocked). We bought a carbon monoxide detector just in case and attached it to the inside of the van. In the morning if it was too cold we could make sure there was no new snow and then turn the car on to warm it up before getting the kids out of bed. 

The sleeping bags we used were all 10 to 17F (-12 to -8C) bags in good condition, except one 20F (-7C) bag in poor condition which was for an adult who claims not to get cold easily. We also insulated all the windows. We bought a Weather Tech windshield cover.  We made custom covers for all the other windows using Reflectix that was cut to fit the window. Then we covered one side of each piece with black Gorilla tape. This makes one side good for hot weather (reflecting the sun) and one good for cold weather (absorbing the heat) and also makes the pieces stiffer so they fit in the window easier and last longer. Also when the black side is facing out it makes it less obvious that someone is sleeping there. We usually parked the van between other cars in a sheltered location, to minimize the impact of windchill. 

The result was that we were usually about 15F (9C) warmer inside the van in the morning than it was outside, so we ended up staying pretty warm. We believe that this is in large part due to good insulation in the van walls, along with the window insulation, and also because of the small space with 4 people in it. We have been comfortable down to 10F (-12C) in the van. The coldest night we have spent in the Van was -19F (-28C) outside -5F (-20C) inside, and we decided that was way too cold. 

Interestingly, we did spend one night without the kids and found the temperature difference from outside to inside was only a few degrees F (1C) so the kids are important to keeping the van warm. 

I started playing with temperature loggers to document the temperatures we are seeing. Here’s a graph of outside vs inside the van overnight:

The key to sleeping 4 people in a Toyota Sienna is to take advantage of the space over the front seats. We fold down the front seats, put the car seats on the front seats, and set up a custom made cot on top of the front seats. Here is what it looks like from the side view:

More details to come on how to stay warm in winter while sleeping in a van!